Dear Mom,

This mothers day, I am not going to send you flowers. I know that flowers smell beautiful, lighten our hearts, and add color to our rooms. But flowers cut from the earth, well, the beauty they give us is really their own death. So, I don't want to destroy that life in order to express the love I have for you. For you gave me life and you taught me how to live. That beauty lasts forever and not just for a week. That love will never wilt and dry up. So, sorry mom, no flowers from me this time.

This mothers day, I am not going to buy you a fancy bracelet, or shiny earrings. Jewelry makes us feel fancy and special and gorgeous. But earrings are lost over sink drains. Bracelets snap and fall apart. And chains of necklaces grow weak and weary. A million gold rings, diamonds and pearls don't even come close to how special you are. They can never add up to the roles you have played, the people you have touched, and the hardships you have endured. All the jewels in the world can't touch you. For you are the root of our family tree. And a silver chain is never going to really express my gratitude and acknowledgment of your role, or how hard you have worked for us all. No. So, sorry mom, but I just can't give you any jewelry this year.

This mothers day, I am not going to run over to Hallmark and buy a card and send it your way. Hallmark can't tell you, "Mom, I totally hated all the practical jokes you played on me when I was a kid. But now I am so grateful because you taught me how to laugh at myself. God knows how important that has been in my life. You remind me to play in life. Thank you for showing me how to laugh that way." Hallmark doesn't have a card that says, "Mom, the day I realized that I have never once heard you gossip about anyone was an inspiration. In a culture and context where most people live in that frame of existence, you have proved with your life, that it is wrong. Your example shows what self confidence really is, and that 'talking shit' about people, is really just about someone's own insecurities and fear. Thank you for that lesson." Hallmark makes cards that are mainstream and conventional. But you, my mom, are nothing but. So, I am sorry, but don't be expecting a hallmark card coming in your mailbox this week.

This mothers day, I can't be there with you to take you out for a massage and a day at the spa. Although I am certain you could really use a spa week. But I can tell you this. We all keep on growing and getting older. And as you journey on with time, I will be there for you. To come to you when health gets bad. To take care of you when you need it the most. I'll be there. So I can't take you to get your feet rubbed this week, but I can tell you to not worry about the future. Be engaged in the present. You taught me that too...So, sorry mom, but maybe dad can send you off to the spa this time.

This mothers day, I couldn't figure out what to give you. If I was rich I could fly you to Los Angeles and take you to all the nice spots in the city. If I was famous I could invite you to walk with me down the red carpet where I could show you off to the world. But I am neither rich nor famous.

Because you showed me that being true to myself is success. You encouraged me in my path because I take risks in this world of complacent fear of change. I know that when I feel like you are giving me a hard time, it's because you know I can do better. Because I am better. You taught me what true friendships and relationships are all about. You taught me to be open to the full possibilities of myself. You have been a trailblazer as a feminist breaking many glass ceilings. You have been an inspiration in all of your accomplishments. You have been the only mother and wife you knew how to be. But you are so much more than what you have done. You are so loved.

You have shown me how to be a strong woman. You gave me my voice.

So, mom, this mothers day, all I could come up with, was this. You gave me my voice, and here it is.

I thank you. I love you. You are always in my heart. You are the best goddamned mom in the world.

Happy mothers day...

-me