ts

We landed this afternoon at Ben-Gurion, and then headed straight into the bus northbound towards Tsfat.

We got in at about 7:30. Thats travel time from Wednesday morning to Thursday night.

one glass of wine and a xanax

I have just barely packed. I try to stay focused on getting ready for my flight, but I cannot concentrate. A close family friend died today. Late this afternoon. I can't remember a time where she was not in my life.  I feel completely numb - in some surreal world. I will be gone for the memorial service. I will miss out on the communal celebration and mourning of her life. I can't seem to even take any of it in. 

My mother cries on the phone - I wish I could be there to hold her hand, to tell stories, to share a bottle of wine...

I am completely numb. 

because you just can't make shit like this up

After much thought, I decided that I would re post what I deleted the other day. I think this conversation really brings some new space to the questions I have been posing in a very personal way. I had to reflect on what I was putting out there, and ultimately, I feel like it is fair game for me to post this and I have no problem dealing with the consequences. I do try to respect those who I am writing about, and I question my motives continuously. I believe this IM captures a pretty funny point however...


In regards to blogging, and I will just specifically speak in regards to when you and I were in a relationship, do you feel that I should have ever or always asked permission whenever writing something that you were part of, whether or not it was anonymous, and whether or not it was just about my feelings or so on and not necessarily about you or "your character"?

why are you asking me this?
and to answer your question, you never need my permission to write anything. it's a free country. if i can't handle it, it's my problem.

because i am working on an article on the subject, and b/c you were the last person i was in a relationship with who i also wrote about online.

cool

and actually, not true. there are many legalities in regards to writing about people who are not in the public eyes (i.e. celebrities, politician, etc)
So, in your opinion, i can write anything about you, make it public, and that would be cool? i wouldn't need your permission?

cool? i guess it depends on what you'd write. but you don't need anybody's permission to write about them as far as i know.

so, then , what would - "depends on what you write" - contain? would it be anything that wasn't flattering, or possibly embarrassing, or mean even? would that be totally based on yr reaction then, and not any any tangible limits about what is kosher and what isn't?

well i dunno. i was really excited when you wrote stuff that was nice about me, and then i was indifferent when you wrote the opposite

so what was it about the nice stuff that made you excited? that it was this public thing? or that I thought that in the first place? and on the flip side, i don't think i ever wrote "not nice" things about you. i mean, you kinda broke up with me like a highschooler in my opinion.

the stuff you wrote made me happy
and the public thing on the other end was when i wasn't into it

sorry, that was worded strangely .
so, you were happy with nice things i wrote about you, and then you were indifferent about it when you weren't into me anymore?
or you werent into the public thing?

both

doesn't being "not into" present something a little different than "indifferent?"

um ok

no, it was a question

i don't know

do you think i was truthful in regards to the public representation i made of you?

i don't really remember what you said

is there anything you would in the future like me to never mention on my blog or in my work at large? or is it all free game?

i don't really care. you can say whatever you want.

may you be kickin up a storm in the great beyond...

drink up baby,

look at the stars


i'll kiss you again between the bars where i am seeing you

there with your hands in the air


waiting to finally be caught

drink up baby

reflection...

reflections...

So I had my little lesson in censorship today. I took something off my previous blog because I opened my email today to see a message from my ex.

Subject : Hi

Body: I don't ever want to talk to you again.



Now, I thought a good place to go might be to ask an ex of mine a few questions. This turned out to be a bad idea. Read and learn from my IM mistakes....

In regards to blogging, and I will just specifically speak in regards to when you and I were in a relationship, do you feel that I should have ever or always asked permission whenever writing something that you were part of, whether or not it was anonymous, and whether or not it was just about my feelings or so on and not necessarily about you or "your character"?

why are you asking me this?
and to answer your question, you never need my permission to write anything. it's a free country. if i can't handle it, it's my problem.

because i am working on an article on the subject, and b/c you were the last person i was in a relationship with who i also wrote about online.

cool

and actually, not true. there are many legalities in regards to writing about people who are not in the public eyes (i.e. celebrities, politician, etc)
So, in your opinion, i can write anything about you, make it public, and that would be cool? i wouldn't need your permission?

cool? i guess it depends on what you'd write. but you don't need anybody's permission to write about them as far as i know.

so, then , what would - "depends on what you write" - contain? would it be anything that wasn't flattering, or possibly embarrassing, or mean even? would that be totally based on yr reaction then, and not any any tangible limits about what is kosher and what isn't?

well i dunno. i was really excited when you wrote stuff that was nice about me, and then i was indifferent when you wrote the opposite

so what was it about the nice stuff that made you excited? that it was this public thing? or that I thought that in the first place? and on the flip side, i don't think i ever wrote "not nice" things about you. i mean, you kinda broke up with me like a highschooler in my opinion.

the stuff you wrote made me happy
and the public thing on the other end was when i wasn't into it

sorry, that was worded strangely .
so, you were happy with nice things i wrote about you, and then you were indifferent about it when you weren't into me anymore?
or you werent into the public thing?

both

doesn't being "not into" present something a little different than "indifferent?"

um ok

no, it was a question

i don't know

do you think i was truthful in regards to the public representation i made of you?

i don't really remember what you said

is there anything you would in the future like me to never mention on my blog or in my work at large? or is it all free game?

i don't really care. you can say whatever you want.

I never should have involved myself with someone who really believes and says "it's a free country." I mean, how can I expect any introspection from the guy who once told me that his convos about girls with his best friends are only about two things 1: how good they are at blowjobs and 2: how well groomed her pubic area is...and by groomed I mean they liked their ladies like their 5 year olds - no hair. Ew.

Ok then. Moving On...

reflection

I opened my email this afternoon

point. of. view.

Recently I asked a number of friends a few questions in relation to blogging or being blogged about. Some of the current faves....

I'm only responding because I haven't slept yet and my comcast bill is overdue and the dog ran way with my pick up truck.

I always ask people to ask me if they want to use my blog for other publications. Its common courtesy and a matter of copy right protection.

Also, I find that I have no trouble having sex with the women who have a passing interest in my work, I don't think theres a line to be crossed but rather a legend that needs to be lived up to.

I never ask if to use my friends in stories, I find that its easier to ask forgiveness then to ask permission.

As for playing a character online, I can't really write about the real exploits of what goes on in my life without fear of police crackdowns and government reprisals and so I have to go about coding my endeavors and alluding to things that should be plain. But, thats the life of a bartender.

I too agree that it is easier to ask forgiveness than to ask permission...

Another friend of mine pointed out this really great interview with the incredible David Sedaris on "Here and Now." The show aired on 6.9.2008, so you have to search for it...but it is well worth it. While David is not a blogger, this interview touches on all the same questions in regards to writing your experiences while including family or friends who perhaps don't wish to be written about. Plus he has a lovely moment on the work of embellishing.


Here is what my good friend Matt has to say on the subject...

Where is the line drawn between flattery, caricature, entertainment, and truth?
Do you have permission to write only good things you feel or see about someone, and none of the other stuff?
I try to keep the focus of the comic on myself, and try to bring the humor and drama out of my faults and insecurities instead of other people's. I do touch on other people's insecurities and problems sometimes, but I always try to relate it to what's going on in my own head. As for flattering caricatures, I enjoy drawing everyone as beautiful, though my concept of beauty might differ from the subject I'm drawing. The most common request is that I draw them thinner, which, as an adorer of round figures, is hard request to fulfill, but usually it's more important to them than my silly adoration so I change it.

Does one have to ask permission if using someone in a story, even if it is set up in an anonymous way?
I talk to everyone who appears in the comic before I start and talk about what the story will encompass so there's no surprises. I don't feel like my comic is important enough to risk causing someone else pain or embarrassment. So far everyone's been really nice about letting me do pretty much anything. If someone asked me not to include them I'd skip the story and move on to another one. Though I then might save that story for a fictional piece.


Is there a difference between writers blogging their experiences and the fact that artists have always created work based on their experiences etc...(whats the diff. between a personal blog and a comedian sharing a fucked up story..think margaret cho, david cross. etc..)
Intimacy maybe? An artist tends to embellish or change a story to optimize the drama or the comedy, where as a blogger might be more raw, not necessarily more truthful since that's subjective, but less edited. So where as an artist might rewrite a piece again and again to improve it, a blogger posts and moves on to the next post. So when a comedian is telling an edited/embellished/streamlined joke about their mother, it's a bit more abstract, even if their mom is in the audience. But a blogger posting a raw/unedited/written in a heat of emotion "joke" about their mother, it loses the (healthy?) abstraction.

How does a writer bridge the divide between sharing and respect for those who do not choose to live their lives in the public realm?
I'm sort of afraid of exploitation. I see so much of it in Hollywood that I fear becoming part of the system that sacrifices empathy and compassion for success and goals. I think if someone doesn't want to be part of a writer's story, then that's that. Yeah it's the writer's story too, but instead of getting stubborn about that, I'd take it as a writing challenge. How do you tell YOUR story without exploiting THEIR story.

Are you reporting the facts with credible sources on a blog or is one re-interpreting one's life for artistic gain? Cuz the copyright laws and laws of privacy differ for the two...
I'm reinterpreting my life for artistic purposes, but I get permission first (not in writing though).

What differentiates blogging for art, for entertainment, for therapeutic reasons, or for a mishmash of all/any of the above...
I think the difference is the intended audience? The audience your writing for sort of dictates the style and direction of a piece. The problems I see come when people write in one style but then broadcast to another style's audience. For instance writing for therapeutic reasons something that should only be seen by themselves, something that should be deleted or thrown away once they've gotten things off their chest, but then broadcasting that as a piece of art or entertainment. Those audiences will critique the piece as art or entertainment, but if the blogger was writing therapeutically, it might be hard to find the distance that allows for accepting and learning from criticism. A lot of art and entertainment is also therapeutic to the creator, but since blogging is very immediate, the blogger might not have had the time to abstract themselves from the piece in the way as artists in other much much slower mediums might.

What do you consider healthy blogging? (what are the reasons you blog)
I do my comic cause it's a cheap creative outlet that I can do on my own as opposed to filmmaking, which would be my other outlet of choice. I missed drawing and I enjoyed having something to show people (as opposed to a lot of my fictional writing, which is only seen by myself and my close friends). The most healthy thing I think I do is the portraits for charity, I get to flex my creative muscles, a person gets a portrait and a charity gets money. It's win win win. A lot more satisfying than when the money goes to me or something, then there's always the faint whiff of commercialism or exploitation.

Does having an audience encourage stagnation? Do your commenters "enable" you, as whichever character you yourself play online (the drinker, the slut, the workaholic..etc)
I guess I've been lucky in that my audience either isn't very vocal, isn't very big or both. Either way, I've never really had the kind of fans that cling to a style or character. The fact that my comic is more than a year behind my real life, means the stories are pretty much set before an audience even sees it, so I'm headed in a certain direction whether the audience wants it or not. Sometimes I reorder stories based on what I'm in the mood to draw that day, but that's just whatever I'm fancying.

What do you personally keep private in regards to your writing that you won't blog about? Why and what do we feel we have to share with an audience, be it coworkers, friends, or the blogopolis at large? Is it a desire to be "understood" or a search for some deeper connection with a community? Is it a reaction to alienation?
Since my comic is a year or more behind my real life, I don't think too much about what's off limits, cause it's in the past and doesn't really concern my present much. And sometimes I like doing the taboo stuff cause of the juxtaposition with my cuter comics. I tend to consider negativity, hatred or spitefulness off limits though, cause I don't see the benefit for myself or others. There's enough hurtful, mean-spirited entertainment out there, I don't need to contribute to that machine. The personal satisfaction of engaging in a creative thing is what I enjoy, so I try to make sure there's something entertaining for the audience, otherwise I just do figure drawing or doodles for myself. I feel strangers probably understand me less due to the comic since they don't realize that the comic is only 25% of my life (sometimes less). I enjoy the comic community, but like most communities, my comic has little to do with it as it's just the jumping off point for conversation. I guess I feel alienation, but the comic isn't so much an emotional reaction to that, as simply a way to pass the time since I've got a lot of it to myself.

So, If you have anything you would like to add to the conversation, please do now! Send me your thoughts, opinions, concerns, comments or just plain dirty stories! Let's get down to the nitty gritty of this topic and see where we can all go with it. I am leaving for Israel and will be gone for two weeks but will be checking in throughout my trip.

xoxo -

holly

i am going back to israel in a few days...

I will bring my watermelons for a dip in the Dead Sea

to my ladies!!!!!

I get my period once a month, every month. This has been going on for years and years now. Yet, I never seem to remember exactly when I should be getting it, or how long it has been. This is really exemplified when I have to go the gyn and she asks me "So, When was the starting day of your last menstrual cycle?" "Oh, um...like, I don't know, ummm...3, no, 2.5 weeks ago? Yeah! Like then I think!" She rolls her eyes at me....

Or the times when you (not me because I would never do this, ahem) have unprotected sex and are trying to figure out where you are in your cycle and if you are ovulating and goddammit are you going to get pregnant and OMFG could someone just keep track of this BS for Me!!!!!!!

Well my darlings, someone has finally stepped up the tracking game and is utilizing the interwebs to its greatest potential! Mon.thly. Register, put in your first date, and chill till you get an email next month telling you "You got two days left bitch! or, "Go buy chocolate and leave your boyfriend alone starting now!" Or, you know, you could choose a more cordial reminder as well.

I think the only way it could be better is if it delivered tampons, put my heating pad in the microwave and massaged my feet."

queen bee...queen babe...queen bitch

Bow down when the Queen enters the castle.

do you want me?

Where are all the sisters with voices these days?....

home of the free...home of the strap on

New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less

don't try this at home

i'm voting republican...

hey y'all...

I have been in NYC. Will blog upon return to LA! ---- GO LAKERS!!!!

dating blogging fucking

I am working on an article about dating, blogging, and fucking with the lines...

If you either write personal blogs or have/had relationships with someone who does, what do you consider fair game? Where is the line drawn (ethical or legal) for someone sharing their experiences for a public viewing? What is legit and what is not...

-Where is the line drawn between flattery, caricature, entertainment, and truth?
Do you have permission to write only good things you feel or see about someone, and none of the other stuff?
-Does one have to ask permission if using someone in a story, even if it is set up in an anonymous way?
-Is there a difference between writers blogging their experiences and the fact that artists have always created work based on their experiences etc...(whats the diff. between a personal blog and a comedian sharing a fucked up story..think margaret cho, david cross. etc..)
-How does a writer bridge the divide between sharing and respect for those who do not choose to live their lives in the public realm?
-Are you reporting the facts with credible sources on a blog or is one re-interpreting one's life for artistic gain? Cuz the copyright laws and laws of privacy differ for the two...
-What differentiates blogging for art, for entertainment, for therapeutic reasons, or for a mishmash of all/any of the above...
-What do you consider healthy blogging? (what are the reasons you blog)
-Does having an audience encourage stagnation? Do your commenters "enable" you, as whichever character you yourself play online (the drinker, the slut, the workaholic..etc)
-What do you personally keep private in regards to your writing that you won't blog about? Why and what do we feel we have to share with an audience, be it coworkers, friends, or the blogopolis at large? Is it a desire to be "understood" or a search for some deeper connection with a community? Is it a reaction to alienation?

If anyone would like to share their opinion, experiences, or whathaveyou's with me, I would greatly appreciate that!

my screen name is hollywoodenflame - we can chit chat all the live long day xoxo

dating blogging and fucking with the lines

Emily Gould - "The will to blog is a complicated thing, somewhere between inspiration and compulsion. It can feel almost like a biological impulse. You see something, or an idea occurs to you, and you have to share it with the Internet as soon as possible."

It always happens now, that moment with a man where he looks at me or turns his face away, and I hear something along the lines of, "Please don't write about this, ok." At first it was amusing, the insinuation that I was obviously going to go share this story, or that one. And it holds a number of wishes behind it. The man who really does want you to be writing about him, the man who really does not want you to. Or when and why these differences occur. An ex was almost obsessive reading and re-reading a post I wrote about loving him, but on break up day it was, "Look, why are you sharing this with everyone!" So, clearly I could only share my love and not my pain in regards to him. Where is the line drawn between flattery, caricature, entertainment, and truth.
Do I have permission to write only good things I feel or see about someone, and none of the other stuff?

I really try to be mindful about what I feel it is my right to share and what I feel is appropriate in regards to others beings and respect for them. For all the stories I do tell, thousands are not let out to share in the blogopolis (while they are shared on a more immediate and intimate level with my girlfriends.)

The man who came over "just to talk" and then tried to dry-hump my arm. The boyfriend who had constant flatulence. The man who suddenly asked me to sit on my face (we are still friends btw.) These stories have great entertainment value, but they also have more than that. A great prophet once said "There are 3 truths. There is your truth, there is my truth, and there is the truth." I really feel that these stories, the ones that I write and the ones which I perform, are really trying to seek out just what in the hell the truth is about it all. Do I tell a story to name and emberass? Never (at least, honestly, not in public.) Or do I try and take akward sound, embraces, and experiences and try to find their essence? I try to.

This is a common dilemna for not just bloggers who share the intimate details of thier lives, but for all artists. I mean, for centuries art has been composed based on the experiences one has been through. A cheating lover, a rondevuos with a prostitute, the man with the little dick. So is the issue one of format? Can I write a play based on my relationship of 4 years, but then I cannot write a day to day reflection of said realationship?

Another blogger I know suggested that it also may be easier for a man to disconnect when he is a subject of your blogging. He is open for public view as "Mr. Hung" or "Mr. Ex-I-Can't-Stop-Fucking." It is easier for him to pull out of a relationship while you are busy sharing aspects of it. But it makes me ask, whether or not is put online, no matter what the both of you are still sharing things about one another with your friends, your family, your therapist...So, is it different because the realm of sharing extends beyond that? Because of the seemingly permanent nature of the internet and what we put out there ( as if cutting and deleting and blocking didn't really exist as well)

What I am asking is aren't most people self concious of how they are portrayed or viewed, whether or not it is only reserved for casual and best friends versus a realm of artistic or analyitical expression?

So, how does a write bridge the divide between sharing and respect for those who do not choose to live their lives in the public realm?

As a writer, could I take what I dish? What are the lines between privacy issues and permission , and has the internet totally made them invisiible? I could have a one night stand with a man, who never knew I wrote, and had some crazy wild elevator sex, blogged all about it, and he would never know. Is that ethical? Is it any different from taking the "ManIamcurrentlydating" and making him annonymous and telling some funny sad story about how he is a novice at fourplay or something? The difference is only that he would know too.






-namely, they have to give permission and can complain if theyre shown in a bad light - unless theyre a public figure who is up for ridicule (thats why the paparazzi get away with publishing compromising photos)
those are usually the rules for publci performance so you could talk about how that goes out the door when it comes to blogsaltho there are a bunch of new propositions under the digital copyright act that is challenging that
-blogging vs public diary
-journal vs. journalism
- deleting photos you dont like of yrself
are you reporting the facts with credible sources on a blog or is one re-interpreting one's life for artistic gain?cuz the copyright lawa and laws of privacy differ for the two
-well, first off, mainstream news sources no longer rely on "credible" sources, and secondly it gets muddy when dealing with issues of opninions - "he tried to fuck me vs. she was begging for its..."

- anonymous wrting - does someone have the right
- you like it only when you are being flattered, but is it not permissible once you are shown in a different light?
its like all great art bridges that isolation (opening the universal) while most art is just suffering


In regards to blogging, and i will just specifically also speak in regards to when you and i were in a relationship, do you feel that i should have ever or always asked permission whenever writing something that you were part of, whether or not it was anonymous, and wether or not it was just about my feelings or so on and not necassarily about you or your character?
why are you asking me this?
and to answer your question, you never need my permission to write anything. it's a free country. if i can't handle it, it's my problem.
because i am working on an article on the subject, and b/c you were the last person i was in a relationship with who i also wrote about online.
cool
and actually, not true. there are many legalities in regards to writing about people who are not in the public eyes (ie celebrities, politician, etc)
So, in your opinion, i can write anything about you, make it public, and that would be cool? i wouldn't need your permission?
cool? i guess it depends on what you'd write. but you don't need anybody's permission to write about them as far as i know.
so, then , what would - depends on what you write - contain? would it be anything that wasnt flattering, or possibly embarassing, or mean even? would that be totally based on yr reaction then, and not any any tangible limits about what is kosher and what isnt?
well
i dunno. i was really excited when you wrote stuff that was nice about me, and then i was indifferent when you wrote the opposite
so what was it about the nice stuff that made you excited? that it was this public thing? or that I thought that in the first place? and on the flip side, i dont think i ever wrote "not nice" things about you. i mean, you kinda broke up with me like a highschooler in my opinion.
2:00 PM
the stuff you wrote made me happy
and the public thing on the other end was when i wasn't into it
Direct Instant Message session ended
2:05 PM
Reconnecting to areaben…
sorry, that was worded strangely .
so, you were happy with nice things i wrote about you, and then you were indifferent about it when you weren't into me anymore?
or you werent into the public thing?
both
doesnt being "not into" present something a little different than "indifferent?"
2:10 PM
um ok
no, it was a question
i don't know
do you think i was truthful in regards to the public representation i made of you?
i don't really remember what you said
is there anything you would in the future like me to never mention on my blog or in my work at large? or is it all free game?

i don't really care. you can say whatever you want.

(*totes not much for thought or intorspection. then again, this is the guy who toldd me that his convos with men about girls are only about 2 thing.s 1: the blowjobs 2. the grooming of her pubic area. i should not have expected much more than i dont know and its a free cpountry shit)lots of "i don'ts" remebering or caring

shout outs

I am Woman, Hear me Roar

Receiving the 2nd highest number of primary votes ever in America only after our man Barry, Hillary has fucking made history.

Maybe a girl can dream about something more than just having babies, liposuction, and sucking dick...

I didn't vote for you Mrs. Clinton, but I salute.

(BTW, It was 89 years ago today that women in America finally got the fucking vote!)

Now...God helps us if this McNasty McCain wins and hard fucks our face into Iraq & Iran...



My faves!

"I'm running for President Bush's third term!"
"...and that my friend is exactly the kind of change we need!"

personal integrity amidst a world of chaos

In my yoga practice this morning our theme for the day was personal integrity. How do we maintain our personal integrity amidst a world of chaos? How can we move with integrity, how can we speak with integrity? Can we use our hearts with integrity?

And how can we act with integrity?

I found the timing for this theme to be perfect because today is June 3rd. Today is another great day where we can really choose to explore what it means to act with personal integrity.

When I hear people defend prop 98, the only thing they can come up with is that with rent control there is no incentive for a landlord to maintain a housing facility.

What this really comes down to is an issue of personal integrity. When our only incentives are based on greed and profit, we get a failed system. We get toxic air, tainted waters, nuclear waste and slum housing. We have a failed system. We have a grossly over-inflated renters market value amidst a foreclosure crisis sweeping the nation. California's budget is composed of loans from the federal government which is composed of loans and debt leading all the way to China. We have to create a new paradigm because the one we are living in is rapidly decomposing to its inevitable end. This empire has failed.

We can choose to act with personal integrity. We can choose to elevate people, or community, or anything above our value level for money and greed.

We can get off our asses and go vote today. Vote No on 98 and Yes and 99. We can choose to value renters rights and environmental rights above the right for some asshole landlords to exploit even more people. Even more with so many homeowners being kicked out of their American Dreams and ending right back in Rentersville.

Check to see where you vote. Make a gawddamn difference today!

http://www.lavote.net/LOCATOR/

Please note also - that Bill Johnson is running for LA Superior Court Judge. VOTE AGAINST HIM! He is a racial separatist who once called for restricting U.S. citizenship to persons “of the European race” and deporting blacks, Asians, Latinos and others who don’t meet his racial criteria.

Here is what Bill Johnson actually penned in 1990 (as taken from the Metropolitan News Enterprise site):

Johnson, using the pseudonym James O. Pace, published a book in 1985 called “Amendment to the Constitution,” proposing a federal constitutional amendment that would repeal the 14th and 15th Amendments.

The portion of the 14th Amendment that conflicts with Johnson’s plan is the first sentence: “All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside.” The two-sentence 15th Amendment provides, chiefly: “The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of race, color, or previous condition of servitude.”

The “Pace Amendment” would add this verbiage:

“No person shall be a citizen of the United States unless he is a non-Hispanic white of the European race, in whom there is no ascertainable trace of Negro blood, nor more than one-eighth Mongolian, Asian, Asia Minor, Middle Eastern, Semitic, Near Eastern, American Indian, Malay or other non-European or non-white blood, provided that Hispanic whites, defined as anyone with an Hispanic ancestor, may be citizens if, in addition to meeting the aforesaid ascertainable trace and percentage tests, they are in appearance indistinguishable from Americans whose ancestral home is in the British Isles or Northwestern Europe. Only citizens shall have the right and privilege to reside permanently in the United States.”
As Johnson’s plan is summarized by James A. Aho in his 1990 book “The Politics of Righteousness”:

Only bonafide, certified citizens will be permitted permanent residency in the United States. All others shall be compulsorily deported “in a manner economically beneficial to them” to their native lands. Although this will involve tens of millions of American residents, and is to be accomplished in a single year, Pace assures us that deportation will be “fair” and “minimally painless.” Money now “waste” on federal welfare and public education programs can be budgeted for moving allowances and the leasing of mass transportation facilities.
Those who so wish may keep title to their property in absentia, at least temporarily. But failure to comply with repatriation will automatically result in its confiscation. Further enforcement procedures are not specified. On the whole, the author is optimistic that if the carrot of allowances is beguiling enough, bloodshed should be minimal. To this end, precautions will be undertaken to ensure that “the enforcers do not become over-zealous in their duties.”

American Indians, Aleuts, and Hawaiians, although not real citizens, will not face relocation, but will be maintained in “tribal reservations” analogous to the arrangement in South Africa. Those whose age precludes easy relocation and others who can demonstrate extraordinary hardship may apply for provisional privileges to maintain their present domicile. But since such conditions are always subject to abuse, these should be observed only in the “most extreme” cases.

LIVE WITH INTEGRITY. PLEASE, GO VOTE!

the opening between my legs...

This is the best new drinking game. Every time you hear "..the opening between my legs," take a drink.



They show the bloody pad. They show the bloody pad!!!

What I really love about old sex education videos is how much they show. I went to a screening once of all these old videos from the 50's and 60's and I saw all sorts of blood, bubbles, and gruesome growings on men that I have never seen before.



I really love saying that though..."the opening between my legs!" I am totally going to start using that. "Excuse me, sir, but would you mind doing the exact same thing you are doing, only could you do that at the opening between my legs?"

Thanks!

let us count every beautiful thing we can see

for this, i am sure, will lead us down the road to joy...

weddings and yogurt and sex OH MY!

Three things I am thankful for...

1. That I am not married.
2. That I do not own a television.
3. Sarah Haskins...



Did you happen to see her Target Women: Yogurt?



Funny Shit.

For those of you who saw SEXXX!!!, perhaps you may have noticed this: After being jilted at the alter by Mr. man/CHILD Carrie goes on her honeymoon to Mexico with the girls. She starves and sleeps the days away until Samantha nourishes her back to life with....YOGURT!!!

Not only is it good for women's bodies, but it can apparently heal you from a broken heart when the man you have been with for the past ten years decides he can't meet you at the end of the aisle because he didn't know if the two of you would still be the same two!!!!

Dude, I totally get that though. Sometimes when I give a lover a blow job, I am just terrified of how clingy he is gonna get afterwards. Throw in a shoddy marriage proposal, fuck, I would start running too...Or, I would tell my driver to turn the car around...and then around again...By then though, I would probably be confused what with all that turning and the fact that I had been drinking from a flask in my garter belt the whole time!

It's a good thing there is fresh, creamy, non-fat yogurt in the world. It's easier to vomit if you have to shed a few tons to fit into your wedding dress. Oh! And it has also been used topically for yeast infections for decades. Yeah, women dip tampons into their yoplait and stick it inside of them.

Now that is the mainstream commercial I am just waiting to see!

That is, you know, If I had a television...

Real Big Boobs....

Pain in the Ass

I don't know what's worse. The ridiculously overpriced bras that rarely ever seem to do it, the fact that all affordable cute clothes are manufactured for barely-there ladies, or the fact that larger breasted women spend friggin' hours each week trying to find something that doesn't bring fucking attention to the elephant under the shirt.

this is what america sounds like